Carah's Blog

Relationship Positivity.

Travis and I decided to take a day trip today.  We haven’t done something like this in a long time, just the two of us!  Travis had a basketball tournament and instead of me staying at home with the girls like I always do… we decided to make it a couples day.  So cheesy sounding… but it made me realize what I actually miss.  I feel like it's really easy to want a “date night”. You know… dinner and a movie.  Once you have kids it’s important to keep those date nights going as much as possible. People always tell you “Make time for dates!!” Which IS true… so I found myself saying, "we need a date night" or "I want to go to a nice dinner."  But I realized.... that's not what I missed… it was time together having mini “adventures”.... You know, those adventures you had when you first started dating.

Travis and I would go out on date nights and even though they were amazing… I was still missing that us time for some reason... and I couldn't figure out why. Today is when I realized... there is more to relationships that date nights.  Today we did that, and it was so rejuvenating for my!  

Travis, being the sweetie that he is decided that he wanted me to come along.  I told him I couldn’t because I didn’t want to bring the girls.. “it’s too hard to watch the game and entertain the girls! It’s easier for you to go and me to stay.”  He said he had already called his Mom to babysit the whole day.  He planned to go to the painted hills and check out a new little area we never have seen before.  Even though Mitchell is about the smallest town you can think of… it was still something NEW, that we could do together. In all honesty it makes me feel like an old married couple going out for a Saturday adventure.. but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.  

The painted hills were epic.  Even though I have grown up in this area, I was so surprised I had never been there before.  It just goes to show… there are beautiful places everywhere… you just have to search them out.  We did a little hike, looked at the view, sat in the dirt and just talked… it was SO NICE.  We didn’t have to worry about nap times, snack times, sleeping babies, diaper changes, potty breaks, nursing, or tantrums.  We focused on each other… ALL DAY.   After you have kids you don’t realize that you NEVER get that anymore.  Not only because it takes effort to find that time… but you also want to experience those adventures WITH YOUR KIDS!  That has been out biggest downfall.  Bringing Alaina to new and cool places is so much fun, and one of the funnest parts of being a parent.  There was a part of me that wished the girls were there.  There was a fossil bed near by that I knew Bug would LOVE.  She would have loved to see the beautiful painted hills.  I kept thinking about how fun it would be to hike with her there.  But guess what, its not like we can’t go back!  We could bring her next weekend if we wanted to.  It’s so nice to experience things with your kids, but it's also important to remember who you spent that time with before! it’s important to remember to have that alone time… but to be creative with it. Dinner is great, and date nights are great… but try taking some mini adventures alone here and there. It can spark up new creative conversations you may not have had before (Or at least in a long time).  You can reflect back and fourth in a different way.  you would be surprised how rejuvenated you will feel.  

Try being a tourist in your own town.  I know that sounds cheesy or not that exciting... but it surprisingly is.  It's time to connect in a different way, and it has inspired me to do it more often with Travis.   Me and Travis are on a positivity kick right now.  We are cutting back on complaining about things that are NOT WORTH complaining over.  You can spend so much time complaining or venting to one another... but even venting can spark negative energy.  Instead of complaining.. STOP. It's a great way to stay positive. Even if you aren't ALWAYS positive mentally... cutting back on complaining is something easy you can do to help change the energy in your life everyday. I found that a lot of times we would say simple things like "Its too hard to pack up the girls" "Its too cold" "I'm too tired to do that.. why am I so tired all the time.. ugh". Even though those just seem like random passing thoughts or words, it's surprising how they can affect your everyday living.

Yesterday was a point in the right direction.  Instead of making excuses.. or complaining... or being straight up lazy.  DON'T... take that time for each other and have fun with it! :)

Hope this was kind of inspiring to you! Let me know if you found yourself relating to this at all.  Thoughts in the comments!